My "ducklings" and I are often the recipients of a myriad of comments from (usually) well-meaning individuals whenever we're out in public. Most of the time people are just surprised to see a young-looking mom with so many children so by far the most common question is, "All they all yours?" Most of the time the question is accompanied by a look of pity and almost always followed up with some variation of, "Better you than me!" It makes me sad for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is that these people obviously seem to find nothing wrong with making these types of comments in front of my children. My response is very important - those little ears are always (and I do mean always) listening. I need to model kindness toward others for them while "defending" them at the same time. I tend to keep it simple (I am out in public with four children 7 and under after all; there's not much time for small talk!), saying something about how much we enjoy them and then continuing along. I'm not sure that the commenter would ever imagine that I honestly do not need or want their sympathy, nor would they guess that I'm walking away from the encounter feeling sorry for them! But I do...
Our society values "Me Time" over anything and everything. We deserve it, after all! We work hard and the more kids we have the less time there is for all the things that keep us "true" to ourselves. The more kids we have, the less time we have to devote to the things that are important to us, to the things that really matter, to the things that make us who we are. The more kids we have, the more likely we are to lose that person we were before they came along. The more kids we have, the more haggard and worn out we'll look; no time for staying in the latest fashions when you've got all those kids! Right? Right?!
This is what our society tells us and it's everywhere. It's in every parenting magazine, it's in the chat rooms and on the message boards and, sadly, it's even on the lips of Christian moms who genuinely do love their children and are grateful to have them. It is the attitude that is seen as "normal". Why would anyone want to have more than two children? Especially if they've got their "boy and girl"?
Here is a sweet, fragrant mouth to kiss, here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery. Here is a soul to train for God, and the body in which it dwells is worthy of all it will cost, since it is the abode of a kingly tenant. I may see less of friends, but I have gained one dearer than them all, to whom, while I minister in Christ's name, I make a willing sacrifice of what little leisure for my own recreation my other darlings had left me.
Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mother's heart, Welcome to her time, her strength, her health, her most tender cares, to her lifelong prayers!
Oh, how rich I am, how truly, how wondrously blest!
I may not have the time to keep up with every hobby that I have (there are a lot!) and I may take my fashion cues from the occasional stroll through Target, but what are these things in light of eternity? These days fly by all too quickly and we mothers who are in the trenches right now will one day have more "free time" than we can even imagine. Let's not waste the precious time that we have to love and shape and mold these little souls by always looking for our "escape". They are so worthy of our most tender cares...
Our society values "Me Time" over anything and everything. We deserve it, after all! We work hard and the more kids we have the less time there is for all the things that keep us "true" to ourselves. The more kids we have, the less time we have to devote to the things that are important to us, to the things that really matter, to the things that make us who we are. The more kids we have, the more likely we are to lose that person we were before they came along. The more kids we have, the more haggard and worn out we'll look; no time for staying in the latest fashions when you've got all those kids! Right? Right?!
This is what our society tells us and it's everywhere. It's in every parenting magazine, it's in the chat rooms and on the message boards and, sadly, it's even on the lips of Christian moms who genuinely do love their children and are grateful to have them. It is the attitude that is seen as "normal". Why would anyone want to have more than two children? Especially if they've got their "boy and girl"?
Here is a sweet, fragrant mouth to kiss, here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery. Here is a soul to train for God, and the body in which it dwells is worthy of all it will cost, since it is the abode of a kingly tenant. I may see less of friends, but I have gained one dearer than them all, to whom, while I minister in Christ's name, I make a willing sacrifice of what little leisure for my own recreation my other darlings had left me.
Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mother's heart, Welcome to her time, her strength, her health, her most tender cares, to her lifelong prayers!
Oh, how rich I am, how truly, how wondrously blest!
Stepping Heavenward, Elisabeth Prentiss
I may not have the time to keep up with every hobby that I have (there are a lot!) and I may take my fashion cues from the occasional stroll through Target, but what are these things in light of eternity? These days fly by all too quickly and we mothers who are in the trenches right now will one day have more "free time" than we can even imagine. Let's not waste the precious time that we have to love and shape and mold these little souls by always looking for our "escape". They are so worthy of our most tender cares...