These light-bulb moments don't happen for me very often in these days of foggy mommy-brain, so when they do I am wise to get them out of my head and onto paper (or screen) lest they be lost forever...
The other day I heard myself react in surprise when one of my children was mean to another (names withheld to protect the guilty). It was while reflecting back on that situation that this "ah-ha!" moment occurred. It struck me that the way that I react to my children's sin today, while they are young and their sins are "small", is the way that they will expect me to react when they are not so young and their sins are greater. If they are accustomed to a mother who is shocked or surprised or ashamed or embarrassed by their sins now, why will they want to come to her when their sins are far more shocking, surprising, shameful or embarrassing? Furthermore, why AM I surprised by their sin in the first place? I've talked about this before in another post (maybe I think too much about sin? : ) ), but when I am going to get it from my head and into my daily living that humans are sinners? Myself, my children and yes, even my saintly husband included? If we are sinners who sin, then why should the sin of my children be surprising, whether they are big or small? It shouldn't be.
Yet again, God uses motherhood to show me more of my selfishness... I think I am surprised because I expect (or want?) motherhood to be easy. Ha! When my children sin it requires me to stop everything and respond to them in gracious love, walking them through the necessary steps towards understanding their heart behind their actions, guiding them through the process of restitution and teaching them a better way for next time. It's a lot of work and I suppose my "surprise" is because I can't believe they're really going to make me do it all again (because chances are it's not the first time we've walked through that process that day!).
But here's the thing, God isn't the least bit surprised by my sin, by my selfishness that wants things to be "easy". He knows. And He teaches me graciously each and every time, knowing that I'll be back for more (probably a few more times in that very day!). He is never shocked or surprised or ashamed or embarrassed. Not in the "little" things and not in the "big" things. He knows. And he still wants me to come.
And it is that thought that hangs around in the back of my mind now when my children sin. I want them to know that I know. That when their sins are small, I'll help them. And when their sins are big, I'll help them. And more importantly, that I'll continue to lead them towards the only One who can really ever help them. The same One who gently and graciously helps their mommy.
The other day I heard myself react in surprise when one of my children was mean to another (names withheld to protect the guilty). It was while reflecting back on that situation that this "ah-ha!" moment occurred. It struck me that the way that I react to my children's sin today, while they are young and their sins are "small", is the way that they will expect me to react when they are not so young and their sins are greater. If they are accustomed to a mother who is shocked or surprised or ashamed or embarrassed by their sins now, why will they want to come to her when their sins are far more shocking, surprising, shameful or embarrassing? Furthermore, why AM I surprised by their sin in the first place? I've talked about this before in another post (maybe I think too much about sin? : ) ), but when I am going to get it from my head and into my daily living that humans are sinners? Myself, my children and yes, even my saintly husband included? If we are sinners who sin, then why should the sin of my children be surprising, whether they are big or small? It shouldn't be.
Yet again, God uses motherhood to show me more of my selfishness... I think I am surprised because I expect (or want?) motherhood to be easy. Ha! When my children sin it requires me to stop everything and respond to them in gracious love, walking them through the necessary steps towards understanding their heart behind their actions, guiding them through the process of restitution and teaching them a better way for next time. It's a lot of work and I suppose my "surprise" is because I can't believe they're really going to make me do it all again (because chances are it's not the first time we've walked through that process that day!).
But here's the thing, God isn't the least bit surprised by my sin, by my selfishness that wants things to be "easy". He knows. And He teaches me graciously each and every time, knowing that I'll be back for more (probably a few more times in that very day!). He is never shocked or surprised or ashamed or embarrassed. Not in the "little" things and not in the "big" things. He knows. And he still wants me to come.
And it is that thought that hangs around in the back of my mind now when my children sin. I want them to know that I know. That when their sins are small, I'll help them. And when their sins are big, I'll help them. And more importantly, that I'll continue to lead them towards the only One who can really ever help them. The same One who gently and graciously helps their mommy.