At the end of 2009 I came to the humbling realization that I was requiring behaviors and attitudes from my children that I was not modeling for them. You know, like shouting at them to stop yelling at each other... effective, right? Knowing that "more is caught than taught", believing that children become like the people that they spend the most time with, understanding that my actions carry far more weight than my words and desperately wanting to be an example for them that is worthy of being followed, I decided that I needed a daily reminder that I needed to actually BE what I wanted my children to be. Kind. Loving. Gentle. Grace-filled. Humble. Thoughtful. Patient. Willing.
On the ledge above my sink I placed this frame that served as the daily reminder to pray for the grace to BE.
Now, it wasn't magical by any stretch, but seeing it there every day (several times!) has definitely helped to make that prayer automatic for me when things get crazy and I'm tempted to throw a tantrum right next to my preschooler. It has made me ever aware of the fact that I am a sinner, just like the rest of the sinners in my family. It has helped me to realize that while I am responsible to lead and guide my children in Truth, I am not responsible or able to control who they will become or Who they will serve, and that they're a lot more likely to love and serve my God if they see a mommy who genuinely desires to BE holy. In more than just her words.
So sometime in November I decided it was time to tackle something else and began to consider what area needed focused attention in this coming year. It was around that time that I began to realize that in the daily hustle and bustle of managing and maintaining our growing family I had begun to see only the planning and preparing and work that needed to be done in any and every situation. Instead of enjoying our whole family together at the dinner table I was seeing the need for some extra training in table manners. Rather than listening to the story during our family time at night, I was getting something to clean up the crumbs from the cookies the kids were eating over the coffee table. The needs around me had begun to crowd out my ability to just relax and enjoy the moments. And it makes me grumpy. I know that I'm missing out and that it's my own fault. Yes, I also know that the planning and preparing and all of the mental energy that I put into keeping things running smoothly does just that. I know that the answer to my problem is not found in just "letting it all go" and determining to fly by the seat of my pants. My family needs the structure and stability that my work provides for them and I know that that work definitely helps to keep things more peaceful. And that's a very good thing. But it isn't my master and it isn't worth being cranky over and it isn't worth missing out (even if only mentally) on the everyday moments of my amazing, wonderful life.
So the reminder that went over my sink today is this:
To take a deep breath. To open my eyes and not immediately see the work, the mess, the chaos. To focus on the tiny little moments that make our life together so awesome. To really become aware of all of the blessings I am given in my life that are meant to be enjoyed. And to even enjoy those tasks that will still need to be done when the silly moments are over.
To put this new lesson into action, I'm also planning on documenting those moments with the goal of photographing the simple joys that are given to me every day. While ideally this plan will have me posting a photo every day, I'm also a realist and I know that it's not likely to happen. But even if it ends up being once a week, the act of intentionally stopping to notice - and enjoy - those little moments are certain to help to develop this wonderful habit for me in this new year.
Here's to enJoying the precious little moments in every day!
"I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat, drink and take pleasure in all his toil - this is God's gift to man." Ecclesiastes 3:12,13
On the ledge above my sink I placed this frame that served as the daily reminder to pray for the grace to BE.
Now, it wasn't magical by any stretch, but seeing it there every day (several times!) has definitely helped to make that prayer automatic for me when things get crazy and I'm tempted to throw a tantrum right next to my preschooler. It has made me ever aware of the fact that I am a sinner, just like the rest of the sinners in my family. It has helped me to realize that while I am responsible to lead and guide my children in Truth, I am not responsible or able to control who they will become or Who they will serve, and that they're a lot more likely to love and serve my God if they see a mommy who genuinely desires to BE holy. In more than just her words.
So sometime in November I decided it was time to tackle something else and began to consider what area needed focused attention in this coming year. It was around that time that I began to realize that in the daily hustle and bustle of managing and maintaining our growing family I had begun to see only the planning and preparing and work that needed to be done in any and every situation. Instead of enjoying our whole family together at the dinner table I was seeing the need for some extra training in table manners. Rather than listening to the story during our family time at night, I was getting something to clean up the crumbs from the cookies the kids were eating over the coffee table. The needs around me had begun to crowd out my ability to just relax and enjoy the moments. And it makes me grumpy. I know that I'm missing out and that it's my own fault. Yes, I also know that the planning and preparing and all of the mental energy that I put into keeping things running smoothly does just that. I know that the answer to my problem is not found in just "letting it all go" and determining to fly by the seat of my pants. My family needs the structure and stability that my work provides for them and I know that that work definitely helps to keep things more peaceful. And that's a very good thing. But it isn't my master and it isn't worth being cranky over and it isn't worth missing out (even if only mentally) on the everyday moments of my amazing, wonderful life.
So the reminder that went over my sink today is this:
To take a deep breath. To open my eyes and not immediately see the work, the mess, the chaos. To focus on the tiny little moments that make our life together so awesome. To really become aware of all of the blessings I am given in my life that are meant to be enjoyed. And to even enjoy those tasks that will still need to be done when the silly moments are over.
To put this new lesson into action, I'm also planning on documenting those moments with the goal of photographing the simple joys that are given to me every day. While ideally this plan will have me posting a photo every day, I'm also a realist and I know that it's not likely to happen. But even if it ends up being once a week, the act of intentionally stopping to notice - and enjoy - those little moments are certain to help to develop this wonderful habit for me in this new year.
Here's to enJoying the precious little moments in every day!
"I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat, drink and take pleasure in all his toil - this is God's gift to man." Ecclesiastes 3:12,13